All I want right now is just 'U'.. No one else.. But YOU !!!

ITS BEEN A MONTH ---> DIARY..
A month I left India.. 
A Month Since I started My New journey..
A Journey I always wished for.. A Life I always dreamt of..
Today I have everything with me.. Everything..
But still it feels, I have Nothing !
Things around Me are just as perfect as I wanted them to be.. 
An independent Life.. Freedom.. Space.. Lifestyle.. Everything.. 
But still... I feel so Incomplete..!!!
So Lifeless..!!!
I have so many people around me.. But still I feel Alone..!!!
WHY..???
Why do I stay in the past???
Why Am I stuck in the flashbacK???
Why..????
This is not what I wanted Diary.. 
I thought... Leaving India.. Leaving ma place, I would leave his memories behind..
I would find Me back..
I could Be Happy.. Happy Even Without Him !!!
But No.. Its nothing as I expected it to be.. 
Just a Single song , A word , A gesture , That was it.. 
& Every thing would just get back the way it was.. 
These small things were enough to Break me down again..!!!
Not a single day passes by When He's not on my mind or shud I say not a single moment..?
I wanna be released Diary.. I too wanna Enjoy Life..
I wanna get out of this Lifeless feeling.. 
Wanna shout out , cry & End this silence.. 
I just can't keep it inside me Anymore,.
I don't understand What to do..
I don't understand Diary !
Should I try getting back ? 
Should I try talking to him ? 
& try getting back myself ? 
Cuz He's the one who would complete everything.. the one who can make everything perfect again.. 
Or should i move on ? 
If so how ? 
I wish these memories could be deleted & Everything could just be erased .. 
But No.. Nothing is possible.. Just me & the flashback in my mind & Everything else just feels so numb </3

Neither can I ask him to come back.. Neither can i move on.. I'm just stuck here..
Stuck where nothing makes sense..
STUCK WHERE I WAS...!!!!