All I want right now is just 'U'.. No one else.. But YOU !!!

ITS BEEN A MONTH ---> DIARY..
A month I left India.. 
A Month Since I started My New journey..
A Journey I always wished for.. A Life I always dreamt of..
Today I have everything with me.. Everything..
But still it feels, I have Nothing !
Things around Me are just as perfect as I wanted them to be.. 
An independent Life.. Freedom.. Space.. Lifestyle.. Everything.. 
But still... I feel so Incomplete..!!!
So Lifeless..!!!
I have so many people around me.. But still I feel Alone..!!!
WHY..???
Why do I stay in the past???
Why Am I stuck in the flashbacK???
Why..????
This is not what I wanted Diary.. 
I thought... Leaving India.. Leaving ma place, I would leave his memories behind..
I would find Me back..
I could Be Happy.. Happy Even Without Him !!!
But No.. Its nothing as I expected it to be.. 
Just a Single song , A word , A gesture , That was it.. 
& Every thing would just get back the way it was.. 
These small things were enough to Break me down again..!!!
Not a single day passes by When He's not on my mind or shud I say not a single moment..?
I wanna be released Diary.. I too wanna Enjoy Life..
I wanna get out of this Lifeless feeling.. 
Wanna shout out , cry & End this silence.. 
I just can't keep it inside me Anymore,.
I don't understand What to do..
I don't understand Diary !
Should I try getting back ? 
Should I try talking to him ? 
& try getting back myself ? 
Cuz He's the one who would complete everything.. the one who can make everything perfect again.. 
Or should i move on ? 
If so how ? 
I wish these memories could be deleted & Everything could just be erased .. 
But No.. Nothing is possible.. Just me & the flashback in my mind & Everything else just feels so numb </3

Neither can I ask him to come back.. Neither can i move on.. I'm just stuck here..
Stuck where nothing makes sense..
STUCK WHERE I WAS...!!!!

Feel Numb?? Emotionless??

There comes a time in ua life , wen nothin seems to matter ..
U become numb..
Emotionless..
U stop botherin about the world..
People who once were the Most important , turn out to be someone whose absence doesnt affect u..
U just dont care..

Or wait..
Is it really True??

Or Is it dat U hav lost all the patience??
u got tired..
u decided to act stronger n surround ua'self with a wall..
A wall of wat v call "Hatred"
U just started faking a smile..
U just started Acting As if u dont care at all !!!

if so , 
Trust me.. Ua not Alone...

It's Normal...

Der r tyms Wen we decline to accept the way things r goin on... n end up leaving it on to Destiny ! :)

Is It Ending??? Or Has It Already Ended ??? :O

Long hour phone cals turn into short txtz..
Huge conversations turn into Casual ' Hi , bye..'
Extreme comfortness turns into Awkwardness..
Non Stop talks turn into silence..
Datz wen U get it.. 
" Itz Ending der... " 
n U din evn realise How Al dis happend.. :O
N by the time u do , U hav Already lost dh person..

Dh person whu was Once Ua'z..  is now Juz A Nobody..
N Al dis happened juz in a blink of an eye ! 
:O

I luv U , But I luv Me Too ! ;)

I luv U , but dat duzn't mean U can underestimate me..
I luv U , but dat duzn't mean , I accept wateva u say..
I luv U , but dat duzn't mean I Forgiv U Alwayz ..
I luv U , but dat duzn't mean I Lose myslf..
I hav My self respect too , N  plz neva eva try to put me down Alwayz..
I myt forget thngz .. But at a point of tym , i wud not !!!Dun hurt me soo much , dat i hav no othr option left , but to leav , Cuz I'm special too.. :|

Wordz may Hurt , But Silence Kills !

Besties fo'eva ???

Wen V hav a fyt , I mis u , I mis u soo much.. 
Most of All , I miss u cuz ua dh one I wanna share each n evi smal n imp thng of mine wid , ua dh 1st prsn whu crosses my mind weneva sumthn gud happnz , or weneva derz sumthn I'm feelin low about , ua dh 1 whu wer alwayz der weneva I needed u.. ua dh one whu understood evn my silenc .. 
N den I realize I cant lose u .. 

Dey say fyt'z tend to get Ppl closer , Yea Datz tru .. :)
But sumtymz dese fytz make me wonder , ''wat if I lost u , wat if u hv changd , wat if I'm no more dh most imp 1 to u , wat if I'm being replaced , wat if Dh silence between us continues fo'eva , wat if V neva tok again , wat if Derz no more us ???''
N dese ''Wat If'z'' scare dh hel outta me !!!


Silence can b dh worst way u can hurt someone , Dey may not sho , but it myt kil someone insyd..
So weneva u hav a fyt , howeva smal it myt b , betta sort it out soon , before it getz too late , Too Late fo U to realise , N u End up Getting Lost in dh world of  ''Wat If'z'' !

Wat goes between a Gud Relationship???

Wat goes between a Good Relationship???
.
.
.
PRIDE !

We meet a prsn , who gets damn closer to us with each passing day..
& tthen We start up with small silly fights , misunderatandings.. in the mean while , we forget the importance of that person.. ,. How special they made us feel.. & the only thng we remember is EGO !

Our PRIDE becomes more important to us than deir feelings , We start ignoring dem.. make New frndz , pretend to show that we are very much happy , though we very well know that no 1 else can occupy the plac that they once had or ever replace them, but still we try to show that their absence doesn't make any difference in our life.. Pretendin we don't care , but actually we do !
We give space for Ego.. & there your relationship starts to end.. The beautiful relation we had once starts turning into worst relation we ever had..
We miss each other so much , but give importance to our self respect n there u go.. STRANGERS once again ! :/


Isn't It Strange???
' We start from being Strangers to Frndz .. & then Frndz to Strangers once again ! '

Feelingz....

V Al Hav Dreamz !
Big , small , cute.. wateva.. it doesn't matter <3
n all of us do expect Luv to cum in our lyf but dh strange part is v start searching our Mr/Ms. Right in evi guy/gal v meet , n thn v end up fallin fo a wrong person whu is juzz bluffing around us..
so Al u Ppl ryt der , keep watching around..
Dun search ua luv in evi prsn u meet , infact wait ..
wait fo dh ryt tym..
cuz they say " Luv is not planned , It happenz wen it is destined to happen .. At dh Ryt Tym , At dh Ryt plac , Kabhi bi , kahi bi , kisi se b ! " :)
Until then enjoy ua freedom being single , n once u get into a relation Giv out ua 100% in it , Dont juzz play around , Cuz Feelingz r not thngs to b played wid , ppl r not toys.. Do Rememba tat !